When the Student is ready..

My life is starting to fill with synchronicity, as I move towards my purpose in life.

Ah, my Purpose - my true reason for Being - is finally starting to make itself known. Along with this is a real sense of Certainty in the Tree of Life reality - that Thoughts become Things - and further belief in the notion that 'when the student is ready, the teacher will appear'.

Seven years ago, I bought the book "The Work We Were Born To Do" by Nick Williams. I had just attended a Mindstore course and wanted to believe that I could manifest my own reality. Something made me buy that book - my soul was sending me a message that there was some kind of work that I was born to do which would actually bring me happiness. I read five chapters and put the book down. I didn't quite believe that it could apply to me, and although I felt very unhappy in my job, I didn't really know what I wanted to do - or maybe I did, but it felt like an egotistical whim and I wasn't ready to step up to the plate. I had, afterall, recently graduated from university with a first class honours degree in Computing for Business. I couldn't give that all up - it would be a waste of my skills, talents and four years of hard study, surely?

In short, although I didn't know it then, I still had a lot of work to do, had to meet a lot more people and make a lot more realisations to overcome my low self-esteem.

From that point seven years ago, I still believed in manifesting, but had drifted away from it and although I continued to read and dream, I stopped practising and went back to feeling out of sorts and resigned to staying that way.

Then two years ago, events in my life (starting with the offer of redundancy and the realisation that I needed yet more counselling) brought me back to spirituality and since then I started my work in earnest. And it hasn't been easy, and yes, it has been very painful.

When I was introduced to Kabbalah (not even a year ago), I found something that made sense to me - something that I could work with - and have continued to take baby steps in the right direction: two steps forward, one step back, three steps forward, two steps back. At times it felt as though I was taking more steps backward than forward, but looking back I can see that the Universe was indeed unfolding as it should.

I started volunteering for the Kabbalah centre several months ago and more recently was assigned to helping out with the Business Gym - which has presented its own challenges (one of them being that in order to attend the breakfast meetings, I need to make the effort to get my lazy backside out of bed before 5 in the morning!). Another task I was given was to transfer events for the Business Gym to attend in to an Excel spreadsheet - something that I willingly agreed to and then temporarily regretted given that it was far more time-consuming than I had anticipated. After six hours of cutting and pasting from Word to Excel, nipping out to the Wonderful World Wide Web to get further details as required, I had a raging headache and a hand shaped like a claw.

One of the events - the Inspired Entrepreneurs London Gathering - was missing information, and when I found the website, I discovered that Inspired Entrepreneurs was run by Nick Williams. And one of the workshops he runs is called "Starting Your Own Personal Development Business". Well, who knew?

Feeling a bit guilty for not finishing his book, I picked it up again and this time found it truly inspiring. In my head and my heart, I thanked him deeply for writing this book. I became a member of the club and started reading his free downloads - and bizarrely enough, if there were any negative thoughts running through my head before I clicked play, each video clip addressed every single one exactly. It was as though I was on a personal call through Skype rather than watching a video, it was so specific. I was so taken aback, that I decided to push myself through my "I haven't even got started and will feel intimidated by the other members" thinking, and attend the next London Gathering.

An hour before the event, I felt myself starting to bottle out, so I rang GBM for support, and he assured me that I would get something out of the experience for just being there. So I went.

And what a reward. Not only did I meet some wonderful, like-minded people (as promised) - none of whom judged me in the slightest for not having a lively business already up and running or raised an eyebrow and asked me what made me think I was qualified - but I also received the warmest, most wonderful hug from Nick himself. What a lovely guy.

These little bits of feedback in my life are further proof that the Universe is unfolding as it should - from Nick Williams transforming from book cover to hug in a matter of days, to having a thought in my head last August that I would love to thank Karen Berg for making Kabbalah available to everyone, and then finding myself thanking her in person two months later (the magnitude of which didn't hit me until I was on the train home).

Other little messages continue to come through, such as feedback from two people in the last week, expressing their gratitude to me for inspiring them, saying that they were so glad that they called me and hadn't really thought of their particular issue in that way. If that's not a message that I am capable of serving my purpose here on earth, then I am not sure what is.

And in my life there are other wonderful people keeping me on course, like my friend Wen who is my new 'Bully for the Light' and helps me to recognise the progress that I am making.
And GBM, who has listened to more than his fair share of tales of woe, and still believes in me.
And Mum's The Word, who offers love, friendship and refuge, and who continually sets the bar for her ability to share.
And my sister Nicola, who, although she is going through a low herself, continues to inspire and support me, and has offered me her ears so many times over the past two years that I am surprised she has any ears left. Nicola - I know that you can achieve anything that you set your mind to (because I have seen you do this before, time and time again). Just get over the flu first, eh?
And I could go on.

In conclusion, I heartily agree with the message that when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. But I also believe that everyone who comes in to your life is there to teach you something. There is not one singular "Teacher": there are as many teachers as there are lessons to be learned. I wonder who my next teacher will be?